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Giving Thanks….. December 1, 2008

Posted by Alichat in Humor, Life.
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So, during my holiday for giving thanks, I apparently screwed up my karma in some way, because what could go wrong, did go wrong.  And granted things could have been worse, it does make you wonder who you pissed off in traffic, or ignored one day that caused Karma to put a smack down on you. 

Everything seemed to be going ok.  I had plans to cook two dishes for Turkey day to take to my grandmother’s.  One dish got vetoed as Grandma decided that she HAD to make the green beans.  Ok…that’s fine.  Since it took my cousin and I a few weeks to convince Grandma that we should cook dinner, I was ok giving up the beans.  Also during the holiday, I had agreed to watch my neighbor’s two cats and dog.  Things were going well until Wednesday night when letting my neighbor’s dog out for his bedtime potty break, I hear a loud squealing noise.  After looking around for a few minutes, I realized that the noise was coming from my house.  Cut to me roaming around the side of my house, midnight, flashlight in hand and realizing that the heat has gone kabloohey.  Upon checking the thermostat in the house, the temperature had dropped 9 degrees, which doesn’t sound like much, but when you consider that for the last three hours, the oven and dryer had been on, that’s a pretty significant drop.  Since I could smell gas while checking out the heat unit, I decided to turn the whole thing off.  So, after tossing an extra blanket on the bed for me, and one on the doggie bed for the muttleys, off to bed I went.  I awoke to a temperature of 50 degrees in the house.  Not as bad as it could have been, and at least I had a house over my head and electricity.  I head off to Grandma’s house, where while literally going over the river and through the woods, I encounter a David Crosby look-alike who felt that driving 35 mph in a 55 mph was an ok thing to do on a two lane, impassable road.  And lets not even mention the John Deere Maximizer!  The gigantic green combine which, after getting around David Crosby, became the next hindrance in my journey to Grandma’s house.  Add to the frustration the driver’s constant swerving to miss people’s mailboxes, and I was in a great mood once reaching my destination.  Dinner went well, even with a grumbling uncle who was ‘put out’ that we couldn’t eat exactly at noon.  There were a few funny moments, such as my father’s revelation that he not only brought a ham, but also a turkey breast…..”I just didn’t think we’d have enough”  “Dad, how big is the ham you got?”  “8 pounds”  “8 pounds?  Dad, there’s only 8 of us eating!  Do you think each of us will be eating a pound of ham each?”  “Well….maybe.”  “Two of the 8 are kids.  They’ll barely eat a half pound between them”  “Well, you don’t know.  People can take some home.”  “Ok Dad”  

After returning home to my chilly house, I set about determining who to call to diagnose my heat system.  Luckily, on Friday it’s determined that I don’t need a new system, but just a new part.  A $300 part, but cheaper than a whole new system, so I’m not complaining.  However, once getting that resolved, I find that my neighbor’s dog has taken to pulling all the sheets off the furniture, then pulling off the pillows and cushions, and “ahem” having his way with them.  You get the visual.  So, every morning, and every evening, I was having to clean the pillows and cushions, and rebuild the sofa and chair. 

Saturday I got my Christmas tree.  This was not from my usual Christmas tree vendor, as funds are tight, and I decided to spend $10 less for a tree a foot taller, but not as full at the base.  It’s a little Charlie Brown compared to my past trees, but it will do.  I have now decided that I will not skimp on my tree again.  As of Monday morning at 1am, the tree had been reset in the adjustable stand four times, toppled over four times, twice with the ornaments and lights on, then moved to the old tree stand which requires a socket wrench to install.   

While all this was going on, the neighbor’s dog decided to ride the vomit comet, and left me a gift in the middle of the den floor.  No more doggie treats for him.  While I’m cleaning the carpet, my father, who was at my house, decides he wants some hot tea.  The man who thinks nothing of rummaging through my things while I’m standing right in front of him, didn’t want to dig through my cabinets to find the tea.  Huh??? 

I think I need a recovery day from the holiday weekend.  I wonder when the tree will topple over again.

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